so they are in my phone as twin 1 and twin 2. but i forget which is which. did i put them in order of who I hooked up with first, or who is sexier? cause i'm not trying to text the one with the girlfriend
1st off, theyre identical. 2ndly, have i ever told you that youre a huge slut? hope that helps
see you put your penis in her and it's like an ignition key to start the crazy
just gave him road head on the way home IN A SNOW STORM..good thing we didn't crash or I'd be dead. I DIDN'T HAVE MY SEATBELT ON
clearly you have your priorities straight
new excercise plan: walk a mile get a bj then walk a mile home
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And for your info. Don't pee outside with glow sticks. People will still see you.
Turns out I wasn't throwing up blood, I just threw up so hard it ripped my tonsils. Thank you Jameson.
We were dancing and she was clawing my stomach like a fat kid getting to a half broken pinata.
That's all? I'm a pro at gay chicken. I'll touch his dick, I have no problem with that.
I understand why they say don't drink the water in Mexico... I just saw 5 guys piss upstream of where the bar tender went to get the water
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I took 36 pictures of my lava lamp. your weed wins.
Hey will pizza rolls help if you accidentally get a diabetic chihuahua drunk?
Also, I found out that my dad has the name of every boy that I've ever dated and their physical description, car type and tag number stored in his computer.
Apparently Angela went missing once and he says he learned were to look first and that it's best to have information on hand.
Went kayaking. drunk. DID NOT FALL IN. Mission succesful.
whatever. i don't need to be drunk to tell you i'd suck your dick if you had one.
God yes pancakes and booze sounds like the best night ever.
Randomize