your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
Time to put an end to this 'unprotected sex with crazy girls who have violent exes' trip I've been on so far this summer
just went to my meeting with last nights make up still on, not wearing a bra, and the 14 shot tallies still on my wrist.. My advisor's questions should be answered as to why I'm not in my major yet.
just found a bag of Oreos in my purse labeled "emergency".
I'm so prepared to puke on walk of shame tomorrow that I'm putting a toothbrush and toothpaste in my purse the night before. And to think, my dad thought I wouldn't make it in college.
NO HOOKUPS IN THE CAR. I will try as i might to practice what i preach, but there are no guarantees.
Then that is decided. Fuck away my little bunny rabbit.
ugh I gave him morning sex and he doesn't even text me back for my bagel order
She said she was hoping I'd be hotter. I told her I didn't see anybody standing in line to titty fuck her either. She was a great kisser.
There's a girl passed out on the sidewalk at the parade. Its not even 10am. She gave candy to children saying it was ketchup. Still think I have a problem?
Well shove his head down there and tell him not to stop til we have a new president!
Just walked outside my house; realized I wasn't wearing any pants after about 3 minutes or so.
Drunk, high, hungover?
...I wish I had an excuse.
All I know is that I got to have an orgasm yesterday during sex so nobody can put a damper on my day, NOBODYYYYYY
I am cleaning melted cheese out of my hair. This is a new experience for me
Fuck your bullshit loser kid and his gluten allergy.
Randomize
