Everytime she would start slurring, she'd stop, hold up a finger, wait like 30 seconds, then try again. I love drunk people
i crushed up some extenze and put them in his protein powder - should make for an interesting gym experience
her facebook's as public as her vagina
Change of plans I'm coming home and shotgunning all the beer we have.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well the good news is my "i'm an adult" dinner party went well, they all brought wine and complimented my cooking abilities. the bad news is i woke up with the leftovers in my bed/on my face
On a separate but also a very relevant note, can we practice drinking wine like real people?
I heard liver failure is in for 2012 anyways
I'm like the kid who wants his birthday and christmas equally. Every time I get one I want the other. Only I don't want holidays I want brothers
Here's how he asked the pregnant girl for a cigarette. Hey yo prego throw me a square. Not joking.
When we pulled over so you could pee, you made us stand over you and "make a roof"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Banana suit guy has an entourage and they're all douchebags. There is no god.
Idk how I even got accepted into college because literally the only things my brain ever thinks about are YouTube videos of baby animals and sex.
The cat ate a weed mint. This is not a drill
We are literally scheduling phone sex... if that's not long distance af then i don't know what is
I shouldn't have to tell you to stop throwing knives at me.
Two of us got arrested. Gonna be delayed a bit. Save me a burger.
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