6:33 AM: I'm drunk at this time of morning.
i just found five singles in my underwear?! im suspicious but delighted none the less
I feel like I need to get rid of the black eyeliner, glitter, and tequila breath before I to that world poverty conference..
Your doorknob is in my back seat, in case you were looking for it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just had a pap smear and two shots. lets hit the beach.
Dramatic love triangle! I guess mystery Asian and I will just have to fight it out for your love.
Bacon Cheddar rum burgers are as great as they sound. I knew that 100 proof Captain would be good for something other than vomit.
Are you stuck outside of your house because you forgot to walk up stairs? Cuz I've been there.
! asked the random counter guy from 7/11 for Percocet. he immediately called his hookup
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have never thoroughly inspected the geometry of my nipples until now. How do I fix this?
we had to follow your trail of clothes to find you.......
Just passed a girl holding a jar filled with what appeared to be diarrhea
What are you, a fucking toaster ?
Holy. shit. Chris has no pants on. In public. Fuck. Need you.
We left an ass print on the conference room table, but I don’t think anyone caught on
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