I just woke up to crumpled tissues everywhere. Looks like it was another night filled with tears and semen.
This girl in the gym has an amazing body...too bad there's no workout routine for a face.
1. my parents still have sex. 2. being a screamer runs in the family. 3. so much so that i can tell what number of orgasms she's on. 4.so looks like i'm stuck outside a while
dude you cant keep breaking into my house just to raid my fridge.. especially at 3AM.
Its not christmas eve unless I give him head. I wont take no for an answer
Was that not clear on Friday when I nearly deapthroated two ice cubes?
Let's just say, at one point i got woken up at 4am by a naked guy who was offering me steak, in a cup.
You kept apologizing for not offering me some of your Whisky, which you referred to as "Jesus Nectar".
That all sounds beautiful. All I have to offer is my shining personality, extensive amounts of space knowledge, and I hear I am pretty not sucky at sucking dick
I'm gonna eat you out. But for science
Exactly best part of my night he took of his shirt and surprise traveler fanny pack
Slap a cop in the butt for a felony charge. Check.
It's your birthday, you should get to jizz where you want to. Jizz when you want tooo
My new plan is to whip out my titties when they arrive. Maybe they won’t notice that I broke the couch fucking my boss...
I don’t care if there’s a pandemic. My husband gave me a hall pass for my 40th birthday and I’m going to use it!
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