I just sold a pizza for the ability to listen to spice girls.
well, 500 bucks doesn't grown on trees, and i need that bear suit for any chance of vagina access.
I love him. He's like the father I never had that I kind of want to fuck.
I've hooked up with six guys in my ethics class next semester...I feel like I've failed already
He wouldn't give me a cup of water for my bong so i sat in the drive thru to run up the timer until he gave it to me.
The stripper was waving you to the stage, not up on the stage. That's why you got choked out.
Passed out on the bench in the men's bathroom. Feel much better now.
I screamed "I want dick!" in the middle of the intersection. So many hot guys. I wish you were here.
I'm experimenting with sincerity
You got banned for life from a $30 a night motel. What are you doing with your life?
Saw the guy I once slept with, he was buying Beer and shit tone of diapers. Glad to see how 2016 will turn out.
There are twenty eight units in that building. There has to be at least one heterosexual in it. You can't have fucked your way through all of it.
I woke up this morning hand cuffed to the bed with three bruised ribs and Amy written in lipstick on my chest... what happen lastnite??
I currently don't understand fingers.
Need to use your shower bro.
FWB wearing glitter again?
It’s like she’s marking her territory
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