She thinks she's a fairy, dude. A real fucking fairy with wings and shit.
seriously though jaeger and i are fucking done professionally
just got tipped $5 to put a barbie in a waffle cone and drip caramel sauce on it while a group of dudes cheered and one took pics. 90% sure they were sober
I'm soaked in champagne. I'm eating oatmeal from mcdonalds tonight was glorious
I walked in on him successfully eating chips and masturbating at the same time. I don't know whether I should be ashamed or proud.
His wife made me pancakes and let me borrow a clean shirt. Should I drop his class or use this to my advantage
I was just hoping for a dick worthy of his established age.
We should hook up after this. Laugh or look horrified to say yes.
We don't have any ice, so I'm using the frozen cognac to reduce the swelling on Abby's toe.
Oh I was gonna ask you the same thing...? It's official ask anyone to see your husbands dick day.
You shouted, "LOOK I'M HAWKEYE," and beaned mike with a dildo from across the room.
blue gatorade loses no color upon regurgitation
Someone who makes you cum so hard that you have an asthma attack is clearly your soulmate
I'm on a party bus with a stripper pole with middle aged women who have all started drinking
God bless your soul.
He had a tattoo of the Batman logo around his asshole. I noped right the hell out of there.
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