There needs to be a term for a female version of a rusty trombone
that's the type of pussy you go to the bathroom and wack off before you fuck her, just to last longer inside of her!
How can it be called memorial day weekend....I don't even remember this weekend
Walked into a liquor store bleeding. That kind of night.
I guess I was trying to make a cheese sandwich, I had to change my sheets cuz I slept on it and the cheese melted all over me, Dave, and my bed
He's a forty-something balding gay man with no boundaries or sense of social norms. Of course we should befriend him.
there is a hole burned clean through my text book on forestry law and I saw you walking around with a blowtorch last night. Hope you have $160 on ya...
I'm 50% okay with that amount of body contact... plus/minus 7% based on where blood may flow.
Sorry about the picture of wills balls via snapchat last night btw
I can't go to class, I have all this weed to sell
FUCK and YOU. times 10. To infinity and beyond. You bastard. Worst. Cockblock. Ever. I'm going to nail your sister.
Do you think the police would frown on me opening a psych drug pharmacy on the side? Just to dispose of my drugs without polluting the water supply! It is for the animals!
So, I can officially cross "getting eaten out in a church confession booth" off my bucket list.
It's a draw. You need to settle it in Smash, Soul Calibur, and/or rock-paper-scissors, the last of which Steve claims is bullshit.
Our son just found our secret Sex Dungeon that is no longer hidden in our basement. He brought his Xbox and the TV down there he is currently sitting in the sex swing playing video games. What do I do?
Randomize
