He is such a slut. More and more my type.
new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
She just messaged me 19 sad faces.
I know I said that I'd stop dating 20 year olds... but at least this one's not my student...
I think there was chlamydia in those woods.
Im positive, your name was on my abdomen, Im pretty sure thats solid evidence
I feel like death gave me a hand job
We need a fire pit. Meat. And a keg.I mean like a cow we just carve from. And cook it. We can use the milk from the udder to make White Russians
So the woman who sold us weed at the park is pregnant. With another small child. And the basket she used to carry the joints is decorated with Barney stickers.
She's like a yuppie Nancy Botwin. She just gets better and better.
I was jerking him off and in two seconds he went from "oh yeah that feels good" to "what day is Thanksgiving again?" and then back again. Like wtf.
Tomorrow we start training our livers for St.Patrick's day. May God be with us.
He has a baby picture of himself on the night stand. I don't think this whole 'one night stand' thing is for me.
Drunk me really needs to stop 1. telling every attractive dude in a relationship that monogamy isn't real 2. Proposing threesomes with them and their girlfriends
We peed on a building I think...like a building in downtown...not out of view of anyone.
I miss my innocence.
I miss being able to say, "I've never done this before."
Randomize
