Hows this for an invention: a toilet that weighs your poop
No. I still stand by my previous statement that nachos and tequila is the breakfast of champions.
just found my calculator watch from 6th grade. the hipster transformation is complete
Some mysterious chinese delivery man dropped off 2 free egg rolls. Clutch
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I miss waking up knowing you're passed out under my bed.
I ended up with a gash in my head from drunken dancing last night. I love life.
congratulations to me i think I am on the road to legitimate alcoholism
cool. same. I'm in class drinking
NOT OKAY
sorry for partying
THATS NOT PARTYING THATS DRINKING IN CLASS
You told them that the brownies were safe, and then pointed to a passed out Ryan and said "see?"
She was so morning drunk she asked the lady at brueggers for a bandaid and my self respect back
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i sent you a picture of beads you send me a picture of boobs how hard is this to understand
Dude, she got "I party too much" skinny. She looks like a recovering drug addict.
He used the panoramic camera on his iPhone to take a picture of his dick. And it actually filled it. Pretty sure I just came.
My bank account got hacked so he showed up with a 6 pack wearing a superman cape to cheer me up and you question why I love him?
Stop leaving buckets of wine at my house.
I jumped the fence at the bar last night. My dress got stuck and I ended up flashing the entire patio for a good 30 seconds.
At the 10 second mark everyone started to whistle and cheer. Free drinks all night
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