At a sweet 16. cant remember what shirt im wearing byt dnt worry im not sleeping w/ the guy who serves the chicken nuggets again
I need to stop researching the drugs I do on Wikipedia. The parts about abuse and dependency hit too close to home
So add panera bread to the places i love to eat that i am potentially banned from.
Can I use you as a job reference? Don't tell them i got you fired cause I banged you tho
Who would have guessed that on my moms birthday she'd have sex with the door open. :(
I might never shower again without beer.. I might also always drink naked
come over, blizzard of oz party. dress up.
honestly I asked the same thing when we had our slip n slide and margarita party
We need to play Chardee MacDennis. Contact me when you have an available date. This is not a question.
just got home. some guy on my porch is tryin to show me his balls. no more parties at my apartment.
I feel like I just lived out a children's book called "The Day I Went to Law School Stoned"
He also wore a doorag last night so i had to swipe left.
Do toy wanna orseer frim onedof tjose plaves? Sry textimg with globes on
Gloves*
Out of all the words to correct, you chose gloves??
Ik youre sleeping but fyi its 5:32am I'm sitting in the middle of the road bra less and shoeless with boxers in my hand and no ride. Shits real crazy.
Not sure she's stomping around my apartment muttering incoherently about wanting to speak to the colonel
Randomize
