so the chest pain/shortness of breath/overdose guy we just took to tm hospital is now running down market street from the police in a gown holding his iv.
So I ate yogurt with the back of my toothbrush. I feel like I've officially been initiated into college.
areolas are like halos for boobs.
i'm in workout clothes. this is progress.
my host sister just stared at me as i knocked over the lamp, then took out all my chocolate, walked into the bathroom, and locked the door. i'm officially the worst exchange student ever.
We fucked on top of all of our English papers in celebration of the semester ending.
we bought a duck. we're keeping him in our dorm room. don't ever try to tell me you've had a better freshman year than me.
Quick question. What's the protocol on going back to a bar after going home with one of their bartenders?
Go back and try to find another to go home with.
No...this little piggys going to the bar
I wish I could remember her name, I mean we fucked and all, but it woulda been nice to tag her in the instagram pics.
Hope I didn't wake u up but I woke up and there is a shirt, boxers, belt and jeans on my balcony, along with a naked guy who claimed to scale the building
WTF DOES CAROLINE HAVE GLASS IN HER FACE
You're going to love the baby's room.
I doubt it. I can't have sex there anymore. That severely limits the appeal of the room to me.
Is it sad the checkout lady had to inform my mom she can't buy alcohol before 8am?
Do you realize our room single-handedly hooked up with most of that wedding party last night?
Randomize
