Tell your broad to take a big shot of 'chill the fuck out' and put it on my tab.
i wiped a booger on my final. end of semester present.
I hope the prosecutor is a dude cause my lawyer is hot.
According to last night if you on the sidewalk at 12 a|m\nYour a WHORE !
do you realize that she was the awkward lesbian in high school and now bangs more girls than probably both of us combined?!
At the end of the night you handed the bartender a piece of paper with the word "VISA" written on it.
and yes i will spend 10 dollars on a vibrating toothbrush to masturbate but not a calculator for my test
Why is there a frozen condom filled with water in my freezer?
Please just fuck her. She's new to LA and doesn't know anyone nice.
my vagina is like this close to growling at me and leading me onto the nearest dance floor
make it buy you a drink first
someday i'll meet a woman who will love me for my marvelous breasts and ignore my many character faults.
I went shopping for a dress that was baptism and bar appropriate.
I tried to text you about going to the Lion's Den but sent it to my boss. She was down for it. Please advise.
Remember I am not doing blow tonight. I REPEATE NO COCAINE unless I do it with your mom
How much of a thot would I be if I put this pic up? On a scale of thot-ish to Queen of Thotlandia
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