Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
Your roommate was biting my friend last night. It was weird.
I'll name the documentary, "The Adventures of Megan's Vagina"
i chipped my tooth tryin to cut thru her pantyhose. that stuff is bulletproof.
Guys, right now i need a picture of a squirrel, preferably with one of you guys but not necessary.
Katie told the cabby "when the boat docks I'm getting off with you"
I need a burrito and a hug.
Pretty sure that's a used tampon hanging from the tree outside my window.
he just sat there, in the doorway of my dorm room, chuggin a fifth like nobodys buisness.. don't know whether to fuck him or be afraid of his confidence
omg he is no good in bed, bless his little heart and his big dick
I AM CRUING IT IS 93:2 AM AND I AM CYGIN INT BED
I called you a cum goblin in my voicemail. I stand by it.
Are cops allowed to hit on you if they're in uniform?! Serious question.
It's like we're in an emotionally distant three-way and there's not even sex to show for it.
so i realized that he's only my physical relationship and beer is my emotional relationship...
Randomize
