You think the Elephant Man ever tried to pick up chicks claiming all his appendages were elephant-sized?
you dont publicly announce someones alcholism over facebook. you dont out someone like that.
You should probably wake up already as I have yet another story for you. Teaser? Blood from knife wound. Tequila. Guitar hero. Kitchen counter. Lawyer.
I was on my way at Dorito Smoothie
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We defiantly won best dressed in the ER tonight
she made a facebook for her toddler.. his likes include lil wayne and ice luge. He has more friends than i do. I mean, Seriously? there's not enough booze in the world to make thanksgiveing bearable
My goal for break? Fuck all my exes in reverse order.
Pierced my own nipple last night, and yes everyone did go absolutely nuts
Well pulled into the driveway, and there she was. Kinda like a Vegas version of the mint on a pillow
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He was wearing an Affliction shirt, a Monster hat, and he asked me for anal within 5 minutes of meeting me. Like 3 strikes and you're out, bro.
what better way to celebrate the birth of jesus christ than to get embarrassingly intoxicated and make poor decisions!?
He snapchated me a photo of his penis with the caption "it needs a home".
So... I may have accidentally just sat on a strip of a home waxing kit.. naked... Assistance is definitely needed....
I'm in Florida in a retirement community the fuck am I supposed to do but watch tv and disgrace Jesus
We got to the hospital and the girls who caused the accident had already added you on facebook.
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