marko just referred to some fat asian and a portly friend as Jupiter and one of its moons. unreal. hyte!
Life after highschool has not been kind to her. She looked fatter than Luke Wilson's face in those AT&T commercials.
Well if my looks don't work with her I'll eat the 50 nuggets to impress her fat roommate.
Haha pretty bummed I didn't stay night yesterday after the bj fest you described
The entire defensive line took care if me when I passed out. One of them even held my hair when I puked and the other carried me upstairs to bed. God I love football so much more now
Half the people who compete die. All the rest either lose their minds or grow an innate fear of sharks, vodka, and fishbowls
Drunk puking in my bathtub has plugged it up for the third time this year. I hate these calls to my landlord.
The best part about passing out on the floor was the fact that when I pissed myself, I didn't piss the bed again.
Nope if you can't be there for me emotionally, then my vagina can't be there for you physically. That's my rule.
I'm gonna call it the Reunion Tour. Hooked up with two different ex girlfriends in one day...
I woke up naked under desk at her apt once during my freshman year. I should have known that friendship was of a different breed...
The last thing I remember is crying and shaking my head as she was putting salt on my hand. I guess I took the shot
Just resonded to a booty call with "how much effort is required on my part?" I think I've finally reached the point of smoking too much pot
the last thing is remember is that strange guy in the leotard...i woke up in my bed, naked, with a half eaten grilled cheese on my nightstand, a six pack in the fridge, a new pack of cigarettes on my pillow and coke in my purse. apparently i bought some drugs, shopped and cooked. typical.
My last Google search was 'can an impotent man have sex'. I don't even want to know what I did with that guy.
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