So his roomate was eating breakfast when I was sneaking out. He's the guy I took home from jessicas wedding. I ended up eating coco puffs with him
Just another sign I need to get out of this town
This just in: Jon Gosselin's address-The Alexandra. I bet if we showed up he'd date us.
Is your delayed response due to the massive amount of judging going on?
totally got the gold medal for the best fence jump when the cops came.
My boyfriend cheated on me...what do I do?! :( JK IM BREAKIN UP WIT DAT
They thought we spoke German and French even though we just kept repeating "I give to you a cat" and "Are you drunk?"
I think I'm still fucked. I can see the electricty going through the street car lines
I can't leave your house without my underwear spending the night.
I must have some kind of deep rooted instinct that tells me when a boys virginity needs to be taken.
There is a hatefuck that has the destruction level of an atom bomb raging through my viens just aching to vaporize her.
You chugged 6 beers in a row and then outed your boss at a party last night.
But in fairness, I would totally have a robo-penis as long as it had full sensation.
WHEN THE HELL DOES ANYTHING IN OUR LIVES *EVER* GO AS PLANNED???
His pet bird was perched ON HIS DICK.
I just gave my boss a blowjob. underneath his desk at work. that promotion is mine!
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