So she puts out... but it wasn't worth it
i want two things in life...emily to stop talking and a block of cheese.
she was giving me head and that cheryl crow 'youre favorite mistake' song came on. she looks up and all i could do was nod
the pic of her and her boyfriend fell off the wall as we were fucking.
The prescription for my birth control just blew away in the wind on my way back from the health center. It's like god wants me to get pregnant
There were penises being pulled out everywhere.
Do you think he stole that soccer trophy that he gave you for the "best sweater award" from his five year old son?
I'm in Burlington Coat Factory. This place'd be great if you were on E. There're so many textures...
I'm kinda hoping that if I rub the right object, a genie will come out
I don't know what kind of soup they made, but it smells like condoms.
Woke up naked wearing mismatched earrings. Didn't even make it to the bar.
Whore. There is deli meat in my wallet.
I went up by the border of Canada. We took shrooms and went fishing...pretty sure we killed a dragon and ate it for dinner
So dude comes out in a full body leotard and a wand and announced he's king of the gays. Chicago is a weird but fun place
It's 5am and I have yet to fall asleep. At what point do we just accept that I run on vodka?
this is the fourth time i've taken my clothes off for money this year. is that normal for the average college sophomore?
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