they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
If I'm having a dream where I'm having sex and I can actually feel it between my legs because I've had a lot of it recently, does that make me a whore?
I have a feeling this is a serious question. Problem solve, Jess.. I'm going to let you figure that one out on your own
im sure we could have fun without alcohol but i just dont wanna chance it...
he kept whispering yes yes yes yes the entire 15 minutes. i almost wish it was a quickie.
He called me while he was having sex and asked if I wanted to go get mcdonalds
I'm okay. We got a prayer rug sent to us with the face of jesus on it. From Tulsa Oklahoma. Kinda weird.
You need a sexual gate keeper
Wow has his pick up routine ever gotten bad. He is trying to use cheese as a way to flirt with the waitress
Oh man, he played the Harvarti cheese card and it didn't work. Now he is flailing
I'm using her Instagram as a way to know where in town she is so I can avoid her lol
and then you two started interpretive dancing to Mozart
Here's an unsolicited pic of my tits, because you almost died last night.
Made it to my hair appointment on time, and got some dick. Today is already a great day
After last night I am convinced that you are the human embodiment of alcoholism and bad decisions.
We can only continue to use the "oh what's the difference between circumcised and uncircumcised" for a few more months before people will see through our lies
My chance to home wreck was right in front of me and I didn’t grab it by the balls
Randomize
