PS - I'm in bed with an 18 yr old-am I a cougar?
No - puma.
You found a girl to hook up with at a gay bar?
No. His name was Paco. I didn't get it by choice. I never had a hickey before.
he was chasing shots of soco with fistfuls of my birthday cake
Oh i know my limit. 9 shots after i've given blood.
thanks for singing to me while i puked last night
The last thing I remember was talking about the economic viability of cock ring manufacturing... we had some good ideas
Do you knowwwwww you never ha to pee while lhr on eztacy
my grandpa is going down the line on this prom picture, and telling me how big everyone's nipples are... he was spot on for me.
feelin groggy baby? need a coffee? vitamins? a nice good fuck on the piano?
You called me a pussy and continued to eat an entire jar of peanut butter with only your hand.
if i bang your brother are we still cool?
I don't want anything calamari shaped after last night. But I appreciate the Cheerios offer.
I never realized how weird our shower smells until I cracked a shower beer and had a familiar aroma to compare it to.
Sitting on the toilet ... Eatin pizza with one hand, petting my cat with the other. I love a sad drunken life
I don'y know if I should feel accomplished or disgusted. I just ate a dozen cookies all to myself. I'm leaning more towards accomplished.
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