i just opened a seperate checking account to keep track of how much i make and spend on our keggers
Please don't die.. At a gay bar... On a Wednesday. Obituaries are not allowed to be that entertaining.
Are you dead or are you taking another 13 hour nap? you need to let me know these things ahead of time so i dont worry.
i just called. the lady was really nice. something tells me my schools clinic gets a lot of calls about chlamydia
incase your class ends early, there are three naked guys in our room. but don't get too excited, they're all gay.
do you think she knows her nickname is brickface?
She didn't need to know her brother was thrown out of a bar for getting head on the dance floor. You're a shit head.
Having a man strip on demand was an awesome way to start birthday. What more could a girl ask for? U the best!
An don't say it's "personal preference" cause I don't buy it. I just want to have normal cool guy balls. I don't want to be the dude that's still rocking the equivalent of the "mid 90's bowl cut" of scrotum haircuts.
My mom just covered me while I peed in the street. I love her. i also love parents weekend.
Trying to decide who to DD on the fourth and I came up with a Who's who of guys I've hooked up with in the last month. Not an ideal situation, but I have a feeling it's gonna happen anyway.
I just spent so much time grooming my landing strip and like, sex isn't even on the agenda tonight.
please don't forget about the bread in the toilet i am absolutely not dealing with that
I just got promised sex at a fire station tonight so basically all my porn star dreams are coming true.
I would like to reiterate that I went to give lessons and ended up having a three way instead
Randomize
