I walked in on my roommate finishing watching something on his computer. There was cum all over his screen. He awkwardly said hi and pulled up his pants.
when she asked me if it was possible to swim under north america i knew it was time to leave.
just found the land before time on youtube... I'm so fucked for finals
Its only tuesday and I need a dd home from work. This is getting too easy.
Do you remember puking up your retainer into the toilet and putting it right back in your mouth?
She was really fucking loud. My neighbors definetly knew my name...
We need to play Chardee MacDennis. Contact me when you have an available date. This is not a question.
Honestly, I've had enough of his asshole to last me the new year.
Please tell me you're talking about his personality.
I am making a budget for 2012. Should condoms be in the insurance or entertainment category?
Talked to Nate, told him he was a douche. Will give details when sober. It's ok. You're my best friend together a wolf pack. Olive juice.
Whatever dude, just dont tell her your first impression was she looked like your cousin. no judgement here. just sayin.
And think got sick again from going outside naked. Word to all females...don't try the naked trench coat thing.
At this point, just throw that mattresses away. Or bronze it and display it as a testament to your shame. either is good.
Is it counter productive to ride on my exercise bike with a cocktail in hand?
Kinda awkward to hear your aunt complain about loose women when you're in town to be a stunt dick for a swingers convention. Just sayin.
Randomize
