She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
No it only became awkward when she walked in with her new boyfriend and we realized we'd all banged her
Never let Scott cook bacon and eggs at 2am while drunk. You should have seen the flames.
i just realized i put more money and effort into 420 then i did for christmas
And the clouds opened up and the sex gods said I hate you alfalfa
I don't know. I was also picked up by the doormen and held over the bar so I could do an upside down shot out of a bartenders tits.
At orientation, some girl is asking, loudly, where she can get weed. Everyone looks discussed but are paying very close attention to people's answers.
After your flask fell out of your leg brace and you told your RA that it was juice, you tried to unlock your dorm room but your key was attached to your bra so he ended up seeing your boobs
Get the cougar, get the cougar, get the cougar. Act like an injured baby deer. She will either eat you alive or nurse you back to health either way its still sex.
If there was a tv show called "True Life: My 58 Year Old Dad Rolls Better J's Than Me" I'd be on it.
It is super hard to find a good vegan dominatrix! THAT'S why I'm single
I just had sex with the megalodon show on in the background and it was just as magical as it sounds
WHAT IS MY LIFE THAT THE ONLY PERSON INTERESTED IN FUCKING ME IS MY 6TH GRADE MATH TEACHER
never planned on seeing last weekend's one night stand again, much less be on the same plane as him..
I already popped my bottle of Rose and took my boxers off. No can do muchacho
Randomize