He just told me his cousin just died and I look like her. Reconsidering the sex.
Do you like marathons because that's how long I plan on fucking you.
she said, and i quote, "i want to black out with my rack out"
Ive given up on my natural charms. Im trying different accents till some girl wants to hook up with me.
I was naked with an australian flag taped to my boobs. Damn internationals think they can claim everything.
Succesfully slept on the roof at work for 3.5 hours without getting caught. I need a promotion
Just walk straight and zig zag through cars tell you get to the road. That's where I am. Perpendicular to the doors do not make any turns
Come in your red robin gear. If you smell like French fries we can make love.
I can't blame him for thinking that then, placing a cone shaped potato chip on the tip of his penis post bj is not a normal act of love
For the sake of my mom, I can't sleep with two guys with the same name. She has a hard enough time keeping up as it is
Lets trade lives
And i will lay in bed and piss all over everywhere, drink whiskey and have sex with married bears
I don't know what happened. His phone, shirt, shoes, and the condom wrapper are here but he isn't. I don't even know how to get a hold of him right now
We cuddled after till the morning. Then he woke up sober... and straight.
Nah I think he's a bit weirded out I worked out where he lives from a Facebook photo
how early is too early to start drinking over the gilmore girls revival
Randomize
