Our Neighbors are trying to steal our ducks!
Is it a bad sign when i blow my nose && can smell vodka?
He's trying to kill me, one liver cell at a time. It's going to be a slow, but awesome death
You pulled the fire alarm because you had to shit and there was someone in the bathroom. you said you needed privacy
I wonder if you can snort coke upside down
And then she apologized after the blow job for being too sick to deep throat. I'm in love..
He started to lose his balance halfway through his "commencement speech" at the top of the staircase. The rest is bloody, profanity-laiden history.
I'm buying you potatoes, the least you could do is not ask any fucking questions and just say thank you.
Actually, you don't want to see me.. reached an all time low drinking kahlua out of the bottle concealed in a macdonalds bag
This teachers last name is pfister and she did the fisting motion to help explain how to pronounce her name. This class might be good
Just once I'd like to do blow in a nice bathroom.
I feel I must have sex with him first to fully decide where my vagina belongs.
fond memories of taking my pregnancy test here in this Burger King
He is so pussy whipped she has made him change his name to Toby
We did blind alcohol taste testing and she got 10 of 10. I'm in love.
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