at the topless march for equality..and wow.not all these boobs should be treated equally
I swear if his heart was half the size of the cum stains he's left on my sheets we would have the perfect relationship
i dont know everytime i see her teeth i get erectile disfunction
yeah, its right past the deli mart where i showed my right tit for mozzarella sticks.
Now accepting hypotheses about how i managed to get a bruise between my boobs....
I finally looked at the pictures from last night thanks for feeding me and pulling my pants up
I get off at the next exit which doesn't have a shoulder, a guy is riding my ass so I cant stop. I think I got as much puke on his car as on mine.
There is a drunk marine passed out on my porch. Mandy wouldn't sleep with him, Can you please come remove him?
He said he cried as he watched porn yesterday; I'd say he's taking the break-up pretty bad....
Well my unnaturally hairy chest finally came in handy. It took at least an hour to shave the american flag into my chest but I definitely went America all over that party
Have you ever looked death in the face and have the urge to shit yourself. I'm in that situation right now.
I wouldn't hesitate to give up my job to have regular bowel movements again
wtf guys I thought we agreed on no more knives. So much for not destroying the house
You just wait. When you see me foam roll naked, you're going to lose your mind.
Oh, and Harry Potter. We could be fuck-and-Harry-Potter buddies.
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