i could't wear that belt anymore, it was gonna make me keep shitting for the rest of the night
There is a distinct lack of front teeth here.
You rolled out of the car, got on all fours and puked then just nonchalantly stood up and waved goodbye and thanks for the ride.
Ok. So let me get this straight. She treats her vagina like a clown car, yet judges me for just making out with the guy that bought all of us shots?
We're both great liars, in committed relationships, and horny. Its the perfect storm of cheating
I just watched how this is made for an hour because I was tooo high to remember what they were making. it was like a prize at the end.
Dude... She just sent me a story of how she wants to fuck me on a boat and call me her captain.. Well ahoy mateys, lets set sail
I'm taking a dab in mourning of how long its been since I smoked with you guys.
I told you, I'm taking a sledgehammer to your walls. Fuck your walls.
I'm Batman.
My entire news feed is ice bucket challenges. I wish there was a hide from feed button like FarmVille
Welp, I just herniated a vocal cord during sex. How was your night?
so apparently over the course of the night my roommate and i had sex in exactly the same spot. ps the downstairs sink needs cleaning.
I should be in a better mood, I just went home and had a quickie on my lunch break.
I had a sandwich.
I thought this boy told me to choke him, so I went all in. Turns out he really said “stroke.”
Is it good porn? Or is it more of that fucked up Cabbage Patch Doll porn you made us watch
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