They just gave us root beer floats. I guess I won't quit my job today.
Can you imagine it being physically possible any other way unless the cows are unnaturally flexible
You would think that an uncircumcised man would understand how the hood of a clit works.
I think it's safe to say me, swords and vodka can never be aloud in the same room again.
We are going to get clementines. And shoot them out of a ballon launcher. That's after we come up to the ivy with a bullhorn and reck havoc. Where are you.
hung over. covered in somebodies makeup. and ready to drink.
I think I'm dead. Why did I think it was a good idea to hang from the banister while someone poured liquor into my mouth?
I need to find another hobby that doesn't include being hungover.
Thanks for letting me pee on your bed and cry about nothing to you. You're a real friend
Damn you are the highwater mark of the naked women in my life. Like idk what lined up but yeah.
I feel like ditching all logic and responsibility and get shit-faced before the week's over. Thoughts?
It's such a sad loss when a hot guy finds Jesus and grows a neckbeard
He sent me off with a naked dance ending in a meat swing. I don't think I'll be seeing him again.
I got conspiracy theory drunk.
and eventually we just all took our pants off
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