just bought miller high life, hungry man dinners, and a bottle of lube. you win life, you win.
He went through and tagged himself on my crotch in all of my facebook pics
doesn't matter. i just recorded the power rangers theme song on my phone. and its loud. was thinking we could use it as our entrance song as we walk into bars.
I'm lit.While shaving my legs I pretended the razor was a tractor cutting down corn. Noises included.
Dude, she knew her leg was on fire and she kept dancing. Bad-fucking-ass.
she has a fucking refrigerator full of four loko and is charging 15 dollars a can.... she is like a mini donald trump
this just proves how much faith i have in "us".. what should we be for halloween..?
You can't be mad because the taco bell people like me and not you. I'm not the one that puked in front of them.
My mom ate salad out of the vodka bowl
also, I heard you can donate your eggs for like $8gs....hellloooo mediterranean vacation. thank youuuu future babies!!!
I truly just stopped puking in my 730 am calculus class, looked up, corrected my professor, then resumed puking my eyes out. He was both impressed and disgusted.
Do not ever get that redhead chem major high. Gave her a magic brownie and she sat in a corner and literally cried about organic chem. Never again.
Some days, I wish I could get a hug from a furry muppet
Hey I’m obsessed with Charlie Heaton from stranger things...not because he got caught at the border with coke...okay that’s a lot of it
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
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