Well, according to foursquare I checked in "@under the bushes" at 3:27am. This could explain some things.
Dude just read our convo. Apparently I was talking to you while I was naked. She wasn't happy about it.
I would say I am sorry for punching you last night, but I found the pictures you took on my camera and it all came rushing back.
That's right. If she can't abide by the rules then she gets booted. It's like survivor booty call edition
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last nights episode of shot friends brought to you by polish vodka and flamingo baseball. pickles cure hangovers.
Dude, you disappeared somewhere on the walk back and shortly after we got a call from your cell phone from this guy explaining that him and his roommates woke up to the smell of burning pizza and a naked stranger on their couch.
You know you're hung-over when you're smoking and have the strong urge to eat the cigarette. No more buckets of gin. No. More. Ever.
Did you put Dave Matthews band on the playlist? It's really hard to funnel when "Crash Into Me" kicks in.
You were talking to yourself and eating cold cuts in the kitchen when I found you
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Let's be honest, I am pretty sketchy looking.
RAAAAAAAAWWWWRRRRRR
THATS ME HOWLING MY ENJOYMENT OF THE THINGS WE CAN DO WHILE GETTING DRUNK
I had a threesome last night with my fiance' and our soon to be best man. Everyone is surprisingly chill about it this morning. Is this any indication of what the wedding night will be like?
gave out my moms phone number instead of mine last night... thattttttttttttttt dunk.
There's something sensual about taking off a pair of socks.
I guess when the asshole said “I really miss you and want to get back together” he actually meant “I’m banging a Hooters girl behind your back.”
I hope she gives him gonorhea
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