Marg and I just meaowed the nat anthem. I was tenor.
'm tripping baaaaaaaaaaaaaaas
'Watching yourself cry on Photobooth' is the new 'watching yourself cry in the mirror.'
So I went out tonight...met a guy who slightly resembled my dad,huge creeper, he asked me to "hang out" so I gave him my moms number since he was more her type:)
Since my computer broke, i've been masterbating to girls gone wild. I feel like i'm in the 90's.
I got tired of walking to the bathroom that I decided to throw up in a cup. I now have 3 cups full of vomit on top of my mini fridge
Weird shit dude, I just realized that the girl I fucked last night looks like Shaun White's twin sister. I dunno if I should be scared or turned on
I hope her Double McTwist was as good as his
I cleared a drunken path to my bed for you. If you hit clothes you've gone too far.
Well yea but it's the principle of the thing.. The fact that he could actually BE your daddy
he said something along the lines of "fish can smell fear"
i just came to a realization. Besides probably food, in my lifetime i think i have spent more money on legal fees than anything else
Just had my first american. He tasted like freedom.
I mean seriously...It's like the universe is saying "your vagina is closed, move along"
Whoever jacked off in MY pong room on the bean bag with your fucking googles pick up your fucking cum towel you gross disgusting fucks. I said NO MORE jacking off in that room. I swear I will empty it out if this is going to continue.
Dude I just clenched/unclenched my hindquarters while looking in the mirror I have fucking talent
Fuck my life he IS a stripper, Ive been sleeping with a stripper named Phoenix. damnit, I knew the sex was too good
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