she definitely has that "I'll bang you, but then I'll tell your girlfriend" look to her.
I knew we were gonna fuck after she told me she's seen that Porno before
Nothing quite says America like barbecue and beer at 9 in the morning.
stephanie tanner's voice is so fucking annoying. no wonder she resorted to crystal meth.
i am exhausted. it's been years. we both know his dick is small. the jig is up.
It's probably just the physical manifestation of slut karma. But i of course mean that in the kindest way possible because i love you and respect your choices
Look on the bright side. Now you know the number for poison control.
Are you around on Saturday? Feeling a trip over
Wet with either fear or sexual excitement
I think a mixture of both is appropriate
I like to balance the number of cups of coffee to bong rips in the morning before work.
It's not that I'm in love with her, so much as I would love to be her lesbian experience.
I told her my cab was outside the club and that I had to go, but I think we both knew this wasn't going anywhere past the sloppy bathroom handjob.
Thank you for helping a fellow gay friend today. You are sublime and deserve free tickets to the Ellen show
And now let us go forth, and be garbage people in public.
Isn't that our default mode?
On a scale of 0 to Thanksgiving, there is no amount of food that fights against tequila.
I was not drunk. There was Star Wars, sex, and baby oil.
Randomize
