my tits taste like a pina colada. how often do you get to say that?
Beer is about to convince me to do something really stupid.
She just sucked the buffalo sauce out of my beard. I've never been so disgusted and hard in my life.
Just sit in your kitchen floor until something speaks to you.
And I'm not sure if that's how you pluralize penis. Never planned on needing to know that in my life.
Put down the bong. Turn off Hey Arnold. Stop calling me football head.
I love you football head
I'm home alone for the next hour and a half, I expect soup and and a willing attitude to do drugs from one of or both of you girls.....annnnnd go
Of the two of us, which one has licked a drag queen's tit in the past 5 days?
I just masturbated and watched youtube makeup videos, which was just an extension of masturbation.
Have you ever looked death in the face and have the urge to shit yourself. I'm in that situation right now.
Now go get drunk with your fam and get back into ur christmas groove. No time for gonnorhea
So is it your turn now to pretend like dating someone else would stop us from fucking?
Why do I like him? He literally has no redeeming qualities.
I'm seriously considering selling my books back early. I don't use them anyways and I could really use the beer money..
Right after i got done cumming i sat back and gave a big Ric Flair "WOOOOOO!"
Randomize
