I'm walking behind a man wearing a womans shirt, heels, mens pants and a baseball hat
next person that tells me Facebook is a professional tool is getting kicked in the teeth.
so looking at the guys i've dated i feel my vag is a halfway house
but i have a bet that her boyfriend is going to try and deflower her tonight so i better get a move on if i want to videotape it
i only understood the part that said mucho orgasmos
just tell her a well fed dog doesnt stray far from the porch, and if that doesnt work just keep fucking her sisters
what's not responsible about a pool full of beer?
she left with her roommate. or at least i think she did. but i also just thought i ate candy corn but i'm hal convinced it was candle wax.
I came out, you were peeing on the car and when I asked why you said it deserved it because its a rental
I woke up naked to an alarm set for 11:18 pm and missing a shoe. How was your night?
saw a dude wearin soccer cleats at the bar tonight. fuckin kiddin me man?
SOME DUDE PUT OUT FOR A MCCHICKEN AND YET YOU STILL WON'T FUCK ME
So his dick was definitely bigger than it looked in all the pictures he sent my daughter.
It was great. He never spoke.
That's not why it was great, just that's all I remember.
We fucked like animals on that lion king beanbag chair that your mom got you for your 10th bday
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