I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
We were sexting and then the radio announced robert pattinson would be playing kurt cobain in a movie and it totally killed the mood
I just remember her telling me "Hi, my names Kaissa and I'm a lesbian" over and over and over and over again as I was crying.
Exactly how does jacking off in my purse count as a 'early christmas present'?
I'd just like to give a shout out to jesus and plan b for making this day possible.
i think i made a good impression on his friends wen i survived 55 cup beer pong
I AM SAFE. EVERYTHING IS FOG. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED.
Just faked two orgasms bc I had too much wine and remembered mid sex that I bought doritos yesterday.
you don't know what its like to have your bartender tell you that you owe him beer money infront of your mother at 3pm on a tuesday
I told him I had AIDS after he bit me. His dad cried. I think I just ruined the little guy's 3rd birthday, but he had in coming.
I woke up with a black eye, bruised knuckles, wearing women's clothing, in a house I did not recognize, next to a solid 9. Thank you for making 21 special.
I have nothing to lose. And a bunch of dick to gain.
Jesus, I think this onesie was designed to keep me from masturbating.
the fact that your 21st birthday is also new years eve is pretty much a death sentence
you tried to strip tease your way into canada but got arrested instead. don't worry, your mom doesn't know.
Randomize
