The hot Japanese girl in my class just said her "favorite sexy American actor is Nick Cage." That, I can work with.
I dare you try and top an Eiffel tower full of Margarita
And by hung out you mean you were in my bed for 5 minutes while your penis was in my mouth.
Don't use the things I tell you while drunk after the bruins won the cup against me
This just became a night full of adventures...and by adventures I mean hitting people with my car
So I know we're not talking about this anymore buuuuuut I left heel marks on the wall.
It is no longer St. Patrick's Day. I should NOT still have green boobs!
Nothing with ever convince me that she wasnt purposely left behind by our mother to ruin my life and fuck our family
He ordered three small pizzas while I was giving him head.
I think my penis runs off weed. I haven't smoked it 3 days and I have no sex drive what so ever
He woke me up, handed me a ringing phone and said break up w her for me. That hung over.
Sent him a nude and I forgot to crop out the Jesus picture in the background. The Catholic guilt is too real.
I was going to try being motivated today. But then I took a hit while still in bed.
I am mildly hung over. Decided pants are very unnecessary right now.
Sorry. Im too sleepy to penis.
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