Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
i think im having one of those erections lasting four or more hours
worse things have happened to me. but if it will make you feel better you can pay for my therapist sessions next week.
remind me not to puke in the mesh trash can tonight
Just passed a guy passed out on a riding lawn mower in his front yard.
Yeah I hope so. Definately just saw two freshmen in very authentic togas and cotton ball beards. This new class is stepping it up.
I think I left my camera at your house. It would be in both of our best interests if you don't go through the pics.
I don't think anybody else enjoys making out with multiple guys on the same night as much as I do. I'm like a wine taster but with lips... it's like art to me. The bruise on my upper lip is proof of it
Umm... How do I tell my roommate someone shot a speargun through the wall? On a side note, cliff shot a speargun for the first time.
He asked us to wake him up with a strobe light. We had it going in front of his face full power for half and hour and he didn't even blink.
You were chugging tap water out of a running blender screaming "bubbles is Perrier mother fucker"
The more I drank he just got hotter and hotter. And then the mustache didn't look too bad
I will go to bed dreaming of sexy Olympians carting me on a throne to the beach where they feed me pizza and champaign and massage my head/wash it like the hair dresser does.
I got really stoned and got my certification as an ordained minister. How productive has your day been?
I Never thought my late 30s would end up with me getting eaten out on a desk in the managers office of a lululemon, but I guess being a franchise owner has its perks!
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