i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
She told me I was starting to look like a mermaid with herpes and I needed to stop it.
"must pass the hog line" should not only be used in curling. but also when we go out to pick up girls.
I tried to explain to him that we just wanted a stereotypical black friend to be in our group. He didn't take it too well... Never take me to the bar again.
sometimes you have to go after what you want
true. and i really want to cum
Just bought a handle of vodka with the excuse of "just in case we drink tonight"
bad sex. bad bad bad. it was like trying to pick up an overcooked noodle with an empty pringles can. why do these guys always seem to find me?
June 16th my calendar just says boobietassels....I can only assume that has to do with you
i ordered 6 shots "to go" what did you think was going to happen!
I just soaked a sugar cookie in nail polish remover to clean off my nails because I was too lazy to walk to the bathroom to get a cotton ball. Is this what rock bottom feels like?
I know him enough to fuck him but not enough to give him advice.
3 words: harry potter burlesque. My life is so much more awesome than yours right now.
How can I prove that I give 401k advice and not handjobs?
he was the first penis i touched… i have to go to his shitty bands first gig, i mean come on now
it looks like a nuclear can of fuck blew up in here
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