I sent him a picture of my touching myself. He responded back "Your nails look really nice"
can someone explain to me why i woke up under a twister sheet
She has an album entitled "my photography", which consists of about 80 different pictures of a tractor that she took on her cell phone. I'm all for freedom of expression, but come on.
Wow. Thanks for becoming another fan of something on Facebook. You make me want to gouge my eyes out.
Mom wants to know why I'm bringing a blender back to college.... didn't have the heart to tell her she's paying a $20,000 tuition for us to make margaritas and sleep through class
no, literally. he fb chatted me and said "since you're online i figured we could bang tonight?"
we literally hit three floors of our apartment building searching for condoms. also got macaroni.
Oh trust me, i am. It's like magic, but instead of rabbits and doves its orgasms- He just keeps pulling them out of nowhere.
Come find me, I'm the girl sitting alone in taco bell at 9 in the morning drinking concealed beer with a straw
I got a dollar bill stuffed into my bra on two separate occasions by two separate guys simply for having boobs. I feel like somewhere god is patting himself on te back while pointing at me goin "you're welcome dude." easiest two bucks I ever made.
Whatever. I'll just fuck him now and deal with the clingyness later.
Let's be honest. I make up for my well below average sized penis with a great personality and a possibly successful future
Found my underwear in a solo cup. That about sums up this weekend.
I have to go buy generic plan b after work. I don't even leave for the new semester for another 11 days. I think I just leveled up in sluttiness
I'm glad you found someone that both loves you and is cool doing coke off your tits. Proud of you.
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