You know you are bi when you flip between the NFL Network and LOGO.
may or may not have recieved head in the car before we came in.
First straight guy ever blown in a Prius. Congrats.
You ever get that 6th sense feeling in your dick like you know its gonna get sucked later?
is he the 3rd person to bang everyone in our group?
i was driving around baked, windows down jamming to third eye blind and eating grapes for 35 minutes before i remembered why i left my house
the whole "pretend to be sober/pull it together for my family" thing really blew up in my face when i threw up into my pillowcase.
I'm also 3/4 on the frats. Its like my goal of traveling to all 7 continents, but different somehow and a lot less morally sound.
Last night when you stole the construction sign you told me to tell you that first you did it for the money Than you did it for the music But mostly you did it for your family
I just gave parenting advice and had a discussion about the distribution of wealth in america...in a bar. I'm starting to think its me and not you lol
First night in my new apartment and I threw up in front of my neighbors door. Starting off this relationship strong.
Meh, all I have to do tomorrow is proctor an AP test. No loud noises and no physical activity allowed for almost 4 hours. Sounds like the perfect recovery period for a hangover.
Do you ever get so high you're like vibrating
So what if you don't want to be with your family. Go drink alone and watch Netflix like a normal person, don't be productive!
Don't mind me, I'm just walking 2 miles across campus with no jacket, covered in highlighter, and carrying a hair extension. Gotta love miami!
How I know I've been single too long: I'm reveling in finding out my taken friends are being tragically dumped
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