while we were dancing I voluntarily took my bra off and hung it around his neck as a necklace. 2011 lets go
You know were out to late when I call my hook up at 8:08pm and 8:08am in the same night.
So I am just swinging blind here, but I am guessing that blood in your sinus is not ideal
i feel like i should invite him over so he can cockblock my roommate one last time before he graduates. for old times sake, ya know
Gotta admit I did think about bartering you out to the gay guys for $20 and the dudes flashy neck scarf
Not good... He ate my chips. Thats not a sex analogy for anything. My actual potato chips... gone. I lost on both ends.
I'm really hot. went tanning and this cheeseburger shirt like isn't breathable
Then, she put flavored warming oil on my dick and was amazed when something she bought FROM SPENCER'S almost burned my dick off.
I fucked him on my yoga mat. Then we wake and baked and ate granola. So yes, you could say I found my center.
lesson learned. Never drop acid before a trip to the aquarium. Sounds awesome, is actually terrifying.
I literally just skipped to the fridge when I realized we had enough vodka left to get day drunk
I sense lesbianism
That's a weird power
Somehow I just turned an entire McDonald's bag upside down in my car and not a single fry fell out. The Lord really does work in mysterious ways.
Fine I’ll come with you but you better tell that guy to wear some longer shorts because the second I see a rogue nut I’m gone
uh why is my bathtub filled with kool aid? or is that blood?
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