I texted him about a book we both like. I was expecting a "ya great book... let's bone" response. It didn't work
You can't hide fat with big sunglasses.
Iced coffee. Banana. Two dumps. Life is good.
I hate having morals and standards the next morning.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
To think... Somewhere, too drunk by buckcherry is someone's theme song
Im sick of reading dumb tattoos while having sex
Well now that I've given all the athletes mono there goes our chance of winning any conference championship
please dont ever try to drink horizontally again. I thought I was going to have to give you cpr
This is simple. Just sex and high fives. No feelings.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Everyone here knows my boyfriend as "Half Baked". Life, he's doing it right.
I was able to hide the fact that I had just shit in my pants, and then wupped her ass at FIFA
Thats alot of pressure.
Just on your vagina. BTW I'm passing your house.
She walked into the kitchen, said 'we've come to this time of the party,' reached into the bowl of cold spaghetti and shoved a handful in her mouth.
Just puked in front of a high school tour group. Based on the standing ovation, we have a solid group of freshman coming in this fall.
i was so blazed last night that i kept imagining a talking eagle sitting next to me encouraging me to smoke more... i listened to it.
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