For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
seagrams + popov + pineapple + milk. there, ur search for worlds worst drink is over. you're welcome
Just washed my feet between classes in the bathroom...Four girls totally judged me...
promise me that when we are 32, we will look nothing like Kim Zolciak. Promise me right this instant.
He took me by the hand and ordered me to make him vodka soup.. I think I like him?
I figured out plans for New Year's and by figuring out I mean I've got a sugar bowl of cocaine. Start at 10?
Saturday morning. Went into a study room excited b/c some1 had left a paper w/ an inspirational quote: YOU ARE cApable of aChieving anything yoU waNT. Then I read the bold letters.....
I vaguely remember stopping for a bag of bugles and some lube and then I woke up this morning with melted chocolate on my hands. I think I love him
The sound of my own breathing is making my head throb. That hungover.
We hooked up and then we watched game of thrones while he fed me chocolate. I don't see how our benafriendship is a bad thing.
I know it's 10:30am but Finding Dory starts in an hour, and I have four points of molly. You down?
They already have a joint checking account. She's got his balls in her purse! What's next, a shared Facebook account?
Etiquette question... How do you tell your mother that her nipple is out in her fb profile picture?
I don't know why, but whenever I shave my balls I feel more aerodynamic.
Can I borrow your pants?
WTH?
Just come to the men’s room and help me. The blonde bartender figured out I’m married. Rachel will definitely notice if come home pantsless
Randomize
