evidently tequilla and lady gaga make me flirt and grind shamlessly with other men infront of my boyfriend.
This is so fucking sad. Netherlands isn't even a real country.
You guys need to get along, there is no need for a pissing contest...We're all fucking each others ex's.
Yes I want to fuck your friends but it's out of respect and love for you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How do you feel about fucking me quick and then me leaving to go do arts and crafts?
He says I tipped the waitress ten dollars because she "smelled like pigs in a blanket."
We're about to go to a party titled 'Night of 1000 Jello Shots".
All I need right now is some mouthwash, dignity, and security camera footage...
I just passed a truck with its bed lined with a tarp and filled with water with six dudes chilling in the back driving through campus. That looks fun.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
lets talk about you, dubstep, and a bunny suit.
I can't turn off my feet"
Sitting in bed reading a porn novel off my phone and accidentally just made Siri start reading the most graphic part aloud. FUN FIRST NIGHT WITH THE NEW ROOMIE.
Ims textiofg thsi woht my noes bcuz my hansd aer stli handcuffde to teh bedfrme. Help me
I think she tried to suffocate me with her tits...she almost succeeded.
I just walked in on my dad beating it.. There's not a fucking therapist in ARKANSAS that can help me with that!
Randomize