It doesn't matter if they shave you or not, you're still susceptible to the staph infection.
420 ftw
Goats are brash and offensive and cocky animals
Are you high and at a petting zoo again?
After blacking out and loosing my phone for a month, I found it in the parking lot across the street. Last text "rager in the street". I remember none of this.
Good point, clearly my love of penis contributed to my torn knee ligament.
they need to invent a card that reads "thanks for all those boners you gave me that you did NOTHING about"
i think he spiked my sandwich with a viagra
Woke up in a pile of people on the floor. His dad was already up and ask me to help him cook bacon because "7 lbs can be a mother fucker"
I either need to get adopted or have someone's baby, but I'm joining that family
Was booty called last night and I was so blacked out that my roomie made me puke before going to "eye of the tiger." Why I'm still single is beyond me
Turn on the Discovery Channel
Lets fuck to motorcycle gang fighting
His birthday is on Valentines Day, of course he's getting a blowjob
There's a baby in the strip club. I say again: THERE'S A BABY IN THE STRIP CLUB
it was cool until he whispered 'sounds like you need a good dicking' with a completely serious face and i just lost it
What's an appropriate gift to bring to my boyfriend's wife's baby shower?
Shame?
It doesn't matter how nice the shirt you wore to the bar was, you still shouldn't have worn it to a job interview
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