he got his own cum in his own eye. TWICE. how do you make that mistake again?
she requested me as her brother on facebook.... biggest. letdown. ever.
you're the best thing to happen to me. closely followed by learning to ejaculate, and drugs.
Can you deep fry cheerios do you know? crucial question
Two dudes got up on top of the pianos and danced shirtless. They didnt even get kicked out. I love vegas
I'm blaming hurricane Irene if I get pregnant tonight.
i've been lying on top of my bed for the past 20 minutes
i'm about to blow half an adderall though and try to rally
Then she cat effected the picture of my dick I sent her the other night. I'm in love.
We told her to calm down. She said "I'm Buddha!". Then army crawled to the cooler for more vodka.
I just bought 7 working mopeds off a guy for $300. We are 60% of the way to our gay biker gang dream.
How do I say "I still wanna hook up w you but I don't wanna see your penis via text ever again" through a snapchat
I feel like I'm pretty optimistic for a girl that might be pregnant.
I'm trying to find some better sex background music so his neighbors don't hate us. This is tedious.
You tried to run away last night. The neighbors brought you back.you were in their hot tub again. This needs to stop
The covid immunization shot lady also sold me a mondo bag of really good pot.
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