...., I just tried brushing my hair wothh a toothbrushg. fail
ps not my toothbrush awkward.
So it turns out the white chocolate in the bathroom is actually soap
the EMT asked how you broke your nose and you said, "you know, the usual wear and tear."
yup, got lost on my way to the final. maybe i should have gone to this class all semester
Next time, showing us his dick should be his entry fee into your house.
You're in a tuxedo, you can pee wherever you want.
It's like god made him fantastic at oral to make up for what his mouth does the rest of the time.
Just came so hard my back cracked. Other women are totally missing out if they don't masturbate.
I still don't like him. I'm also filled with alcohol, so I'll revisit the statement in the morning.
I just scored a new eye doctor and a date all in one email. BOOM!
And it's settled. 10 months is the appropriate amount of time before having the dick pic discussion.
You said if the geese can walk on the lake so can I.
I’m ready to be reckless and make stupid decisions, and I need you to support me in that.
U dont jog and buy condoms n bulk
Just used a NyQuil cup to take a shot. This night is headed nowhere good.
Randomize
