I wish I could google chicago male strippers on my work computer but I don't feel like talking to HR today
How did currency from Costa Rica make it's way into my wallet...?
you know by doing this we are using dad as a drug mule right?
I think my penis ruined a perfectly good friendship.
i just added no after every hockey player in my phone..
his roommates said i can move in if i promise to only drink tequila the rest of the semester. challenge accepted.
You're going to the beach with me so we can have beach sex whether you like it or not. Get over it. Kthx.
OK WHO CHANGED MY RING TONE TO LADY AND THE TRAMP AND CHANGED EVERY CONTACT IN MY PHONE TO 'SOME GUY I FUCKED'?
I peed on his girlfriend's loofah during our post-sex shower.
No it was good. I serenaded the holding cell occupants with a fabulous rendition of Making Love out of Nothing at all. It was fucking amazing!
She looks like a hot George Washington...I'm going for it
Note to self don't stop having sex during an earthquake! I call it a 6.1 orgasm!
now that we broke up we are playing hot potato with the cock ring.. Poor thing just needs a home
Nothing like waking up and having two guys who aren't your boyfriend talk to you about their hard dicks before 9 am.
Would it be totally wrong, that in honor of princess leias death, I role played as her??
Randomize
