So I said to her: one time i broke my dick and when they took off the cast i could cum across a baseball field
she farted while i was going down on her. not doing that again
Was it cool?
About as cool as only getting a handjob on your honeymoon.
I told my new friends about my possible new chin. They said I should get my nose done first. Please tell me I'm pretty or something.
Don't worry, there is no such thing as a fat, old or ugly blow job.
everyday i become more and more impressed with my facebook stalking skills
the trail of clothing leading from the bed to the door was in the exact order i needed to put them on. underwear near the bed shoes by the door.
who was wearing the fake mustache? I just found one in my cleavage
the last guy with this job had a bookshelf fall on him. He's in the Er. Im high and they gave me his shift. How do you think i feel?
all time personal low: room service guy going "You want french fries AND onion rings???"
Do you ever feel like a plastic bag?!
Made up a full house drinking game
On my way.
His dick's name has evolved from Sebastian to Big Daddy to Barbara Streisand to Barbara Walters. I think the transformation is finally complete.
I went down on her on the dining room table. That should count for something.
I'm sorry for drunkenly throwing a spoon at you and then laughing at your pain.
Randomize
