I'm going to let the use of the word "hella" slide considering I have sperm older than you.
i have no concept of time, i feel my nose, and im seeing everything in bitty hexagons.
dude, she masturbates with a ken doll.
My dad just walked in on me screwing the chick from the bar...the look of relief on his face was sort of hurtful.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
But please don't judge me if i smell like mustard
Is it penis luge time yet?
No, listening to the fray and drinking a bottle of jack daniels does not count as counseling
And all you did was hit on me and do things "for America", so you weren't judged heavily
3-9 out of 10... Depends on the situation. Taco Bell is more of an idea than a restaurant.
How stoned are you?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up to an alarm on my phone that said "Buy Plan B" and then the guy offered me a hairbrush... which seemed polite at the time
Hey where the fuck is the rest of my beer? Lets start this day off right
Your choices in alcohol this weekend are thoroughly disappointing
He kept screaming "I am the thunder!" when he was riding me.
We took three cabs to get home, the first one dropped us off a block away, so we went back to the hotel and tried again
I vaguely remember ordering a water at some point last night. It's good to know drunk me can still be responsible.
Randomize