worst experience of my life. her nipples were sick. kinda like a venn diagram
this is two weekends in a row I've been the pantsless girl at the party. I love my social life.
Don't worry we didnt bang. Sometimes I just bring guys home so I don't order pizza.
I just remember thinking that if i ran really fast through the house, no one would notice i was naked.
you said you were a responsible adult. then you licked the wall.
Bachelor party turned 19 hour search and rescue in the mountains. nbd
I sent her 8 pictures of my dick in a baked potato. Not sure how I thought that would get me laid later.
I woke up in my living room, on the floor, wearing nothing but a fur coat?
That's what tomorrow is for. It's like bloodletting. Except with shame and liquor.
I just had a flashback to the three of us in the bed and me shouting AM I THE BIGGEST OR LITTLEST SPOON?!
So I woke up alone in the hotel room clutching a bible to my chest. Explain, please.
I am the worst person to have nipple rings I'm hanging ornaments off of then and sending everyone a tits the season to be jolly
Could someone explain to me why there were 40 individually wrapped burritos in the fridge when I woke up this morning?
anything below 65° is too cold to be naked on a roof
I tried to fuck you in my bathroom while my parents were in the next room. I am a clusterfuck of fun.
Randomize
