I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
Sweater Vest, Chin Strap, Beard, sporting a white Beret- Please don't ever let me be THAT guy.
his cum tasted like old pizza and looked like old milk
Cute you're picking friends over dick. I feel like this is the trailer for a lifetime movie.
I love how understanding people are when they hear we first hooked up getting high and watching nature shows
You said your dick dragged you up the stairs
She stole my hamster. idk who she was, she just walked in and said she knew Keith so she stayed, drank 6 beers, and then stole Charles.
i DID try to find you last night. i asked where you were and you texted me the letter "e" and a picture of the dark.
Just write off about 10000+ brain cells and 6 months of your lifespan.
Sounds like a normal friday night
Remember when we pinky swore we'd never feel hungover alone...
Great news I took pics last night
Warning: most of them are of you peeing while I take selfies
were facing impending death from north korea and were sitting here snorting tylenol to get high.....where did our lives go wrong?
The only thing he told me before he passed out was that he is from Buffalo and I'm a bitch.
Welp, no use in crying over spilt milk. I can't unbang her.
You texted me a picture of some random naked guy. Did you lose your virginity?
Randomize
